Often, the purpose of trouble talk is opening up about an emotional need, not 'fixing' a specific problem in the eyes of many women.
Public talk
The sphere of public talk could be summed up in the phrase 'not in front of the neighbors' -- in other words, certain types of dialogue and ways of relating are not deemed permissible in front of strangers. Think of the embarrassment of seeing a child disciplined in public, when a parent loses control. Parental discipline is supposed to be private, not public display. Cultures have different levels of what is acceptable publicly -- in some cultures, shaming someone in public is considered 'not done' or at very least far worse than in private, or intimate affection is not considered appropriate public talk. Even in relatively uninhibited America, seeing a man propose to a woman, or a couple engaging in an intimate moment can cause people to look away.
Private talk
When it is necessary to give someone private time, like a salesman leaving so married couple to discuss the cost of a new car, also varies from culture to culture. In some cultures, matters such as money or sexuality are supposed to be discussed only amongst families or intimates.
Status & connection talk
Well, of course, I only buy designer brands," someone might say, examining a cheap knock-off purse, and showing her superiority to her presumably poorer colleague. However, when the...
Phrases like "I only buy organic" or "I only vote Democrat" also locate persons within particular cultures or status groups, and can be used to affirm a connection or establish a higher status over a conversational partner.
Directness & indirectness talk
Cultures are often classified as low or high context cultures. In some cultures, or low context cultures, directness is valued. In America, someone who is a 'straight shooter' conversationally is considered a good thing. This is often also a very male way of relating to others, as women are more often apt to use questions to prompt their opinion like saying "are you tired," rather than saying "I'm tired, let's take a break." However, in other cultures, such as Japan, which might be called high context cultures, or cultures where what one says is very dependant upon the situation and one's relationship as a superior or subordinate, both men and women may be more indirect in saying what their opinion is. "Maybe" is likely to mean "no," especially if a subordinate is speaking to a superior while in a U.S. context, regardless of the relationship, maybe means maybe.
Works Referenced
Tannen, Deborah.
That's Not What I Meant!: How Conversational Style Makes or Breaks Relationships. NY: Ballantine, 1986.
